Shades of Grey
by MidnightMyth
Summary: Listen to a shinobi's tale of sorrow and joy within war. As she weaves a story unheard 'til now, set in a time where you cannot descern friend from foe. Where she finds a lover in chaos, and learns that the world is not all black and white,but grey.Sakux?


A/N: Hello! This is just the prologue!! I am going through with this theme to the very end. Very few dialogue will be used. And this is an experiment of writing I just found, so I may not be very good with it! But please bare with me. Down below is a former shinobi talking to... well, you. Kinda sorta. You'll get it if you read it. And remember! This is an old person talking, a former shinobi, so the talking will take a while... so, yeah.

_Notes:_This is the future, kind of like ours. Where they have the same technology as us, but a different background. The usage of chakra is almost non-existent and the common civilian now has not known shinobi in quite a while. They became more like legends, fairy tales with a twisted side. You get the idea.

But anyway, please Read and Review! I want to become a writer when I grow up, so I want some help in my writing. I don't want to have beta's, cuz I want to figure this out on my own. But it would help if you guys would give me some advice... You know? But no outright flames. My ego could not withstand that. And I would report you for abuse. Yes, I am serious. I have had this problem before, and that person would not go away. And I am not going to take that risk.

I do not own anything, nor do I claim to. I just own the plot. Please do not copyright this. I worked hard on it. So, yeah. Standard disclaimer applied.

_(© Copyright 2008 6436448-Midnight (FictionPress ID:1424569). All rights reserved. Distribution of any kind is prohibited without the written consent of 6436448-Midnight._)

Now... Story...

Start!

oOo

_Why hello there, young one. It's a beautiful day, and it's rare to see one such as you out. __You young people, always on your computers and using your cellphones. __Never have time to simply enjoy nature.__To just simply be grateful you are alive._

_What do I mean by that? Well, when you were in a profession I was in, then you would know. You would know what it feels like to feel happy you are alive. To feel exhilarated at the simple act of breathing._

_To feel yourself breathing. To be alive._

_You don't know what I mean? Hehe, you need to see underneath what you perceive is the underneath._

_Yes, I suppose I am speaking in riddles, twists and turns, half-truths, and half-lies. But, I have been doing so for so long, that it becomes natural. _

_This? Oh, this old thing. This, my dear, is a hitai-ate. __It was used to signify what country you were from. _

_Why would we need something such as this? Well, there were others in our profession that were from different countries. And they weren't exactly friends. __It shows that we had a certain affiliation to a village, and that we were loyal to them. But if you betrayed that certain village, you scratch through the symbol. _

_What did we do? Well, that's hard to explain. To one who has always seen things in black and white. You could say, we lived in the grey shades of life. The place between the shadows and the light._

_What were we, you ask, dear?__Why, we were called, _shinobi.

_Be patient. I will tell you all about what they did, in time. But first, I must describe what the world was like then, before you decided to plow down mountains and hills, block beautiful rivers, and burn down magnificent forests._

_Now, take deep breaths before I tell you about my world. Close your eyes and take your time. Take time to memorize the sight of your skyscrapers, and savor the smell of the city. Savor the taste of your air, the sight of your cities, and sounds of their talking and laughter. To remember the feelings for those you care about, and those you hate. For those you admire, and for those you pity.  
Good._

_Now forget them._

_--_

Now, I possess no such talent in words, child. But I will do my best to describe it to one such as you. If I could, I would paint a picture of what I have seen. But alas, these old hands are not meant for those kinds of arts. I cannot take a scene from my memories, and immortalize it. I cannot put emotions and thousands of words onto a canvas with a single stroke. All I can do, is try to get you to feel what I felt, and see what I saw, through words. And I will try my best.

Imagine then, the forest to the back of you, the trees looming over you. Old and grand, possessing knowledge and hidden memories within their leaves, not meant to be heard by you. Whispering their secrets in a centuries old song, never to be understood by mortals. The sun's gentle caress you feel against your skin, peeking through the gaps in branches, though there are few. Now, breath in the musky scent of damp earth, and try to listen to the whispered song around you.

Look down, the cliff you are standing on. Below you, the grass stretches on, only to fade into the tan you know belongs to the sand. The slowly dancing strands perfectly in beat to the tune the forests behind you plays. Beyond, you can see sand begin to whirl, in time to it's partner's sway. And even if it should have clashed, it's difference so inevitable, it does not. The dance only seems to look choreographed in such a way, that you know that they are different things. Yet, working together to make something unique and beautiful.

So transfixed with the dance, you were, that you didn't even notice the growing darkness that surrounds you. So intent with your observations, child, so focused. So unaware of the changes in the air.

The fingers of night gently descends to hold onto you. It's refreshing air wafting into your lungs, and cooling your skin. You close your eyes to the world around you, and concentrate on the feel of the contrast of the sun's caresses, and the night's gentle lulling. You open your eyes and turn your head to the skies.

It's that time when the stars shine brightly enough to be seen, but it's only a fading light. Gone seconds after, and you wonder if you were just imaging things. It's the time when the sun is on one side of where you stand, and the moon overhead, brooding over a centuries old fude. One that was far before man was ever dreamt of.

It's the time when the moon starts to stir, and the sun prepares for sleep. When the day and night mix perfectly, not one outweighing the other.

Absently, you note that it was a bright day. Clear and with the slight nipping of cold. It will be a pleasantly chilly night, plenty of stars and without a cloud in sight.

But, my dear, it's not completely dark yet.

You are caught between that moment when you decide whether to relax, and rest. Or to stay alert. And awake. When the images of desires begin to stir within your subconscious, and the reality of the day starts to fade. The instant before forgetting the world and staying in your own, or dwelling in the harsh reality of life. The moment when you could dream about the days to come, or be aware of those around you, but you can't decide because you don't account for both actions. You don't even realize you _can_. Or can't. _That_ Moment. When the world doesn't seem to exist, and you are about to plunge into your own fantasies, but are still conscious of your environment.

You are aware of what you have to do, when the process of coming into night is reversed. The horrors that will happen to you, that you will see, and will _commit_. You are dimly aware that it will be worth it, in the end. When you are alive, and standing there. Still breathing while those around are not so lucky.

You wonder, what it would be like, to live a normal life. To never have to wonder if your last victim had a family and friends that will miss him. To never have to feel so dirty, even when you have scrubbed yourself raw. But as soon as the thought enters your mind, you dismiss it. You have come too far now. Worked too hard now. _Bled_ too much now. To just give up.

You will never forget. To look at each shadow to make sure that no one is hiding there. All the reflexes ingrained into you will never leave. So long as there will be dangers in the world, and shadows in the streets. You will not forget what it feels like, when you come out of a fierce battle battered and bruised and bleeding. But _alive_.

You know that it will benefit the good of your homeland, and in turn your own friends and family. But you know, that the person you will meet in the battlefield, is saying the same thing. Thinking the same things. Probably _feeling_ the same things.

Ironically, you wonder if your next opponent's face will be forever ingrained into your memory. And if you live to kill another day- to breath another day- will that same person's face just blur like the rest? And you know, that the guilt and the rage will still be there, never blurring like the faces. Adding to the rest of your burden.

Breaking out of your reverie, you stare at the moon. Knowing what is to come. And somehow, you are resigned to your fate. Not exactly happy with it, but it's not as bad as it could be. The second that thought enters your mind, you snap at yourself for trying to console yourself. Emotions are for the weak and the needy. You are a soldier. A tool needed in war, and at the disposal of your leader. To gain that weakness, would mean that you are obsolete. And what good is a weapon that cannot be used? That is not effective? It's useless, is what it is. But no matter how much you tell yourself that you are only a weapon, and have no need for things such as emotions, you cannot stop yourself. You are but a human. And pretty soon, you will run the course of your use. And will be tossed aside as a result. But now is not the time to be sorry for yourself, or to contemplate what your future holds. That is, if you survive. Now is the time, to study your surroundings.

You look at the forests behind you, and pay no mind to it's mystical quality, but now look at it with a critical eye. You look at the sands and do not see the age old dance you once saw, but see places an enemy can hide traps. Taking a deep breath, you gauge that the wind is coming from the direction of the forests. The once soothing scent of musky earth does not enter your mind, but the thought that it will be easier to smell other disturbances or hear any others, is all that runs through your head.

You look towards the sky, and begin to feel weary, you exhastion catching up to you.

The sun is gone now, and it is time to rest. Yes you will be resting your body, but not your mind. You will still search for the moving shadows, and the things that are unfitting to your current environment.

You lay your head down, listening to the earth's heartbeat. You turn to your side, looking at the stars in a barely there appreciation. You let your body relax, and mold into the earth. Your eyes gently drift shut, lulled by the sound of the still whispered song. Changing it's tune to match that of the night. Your breathing evens out, and soon your dreams come to life, and you are engulfed in your desires.

Surrounded by friends and family, that you have not seen in what you think is centuries, laughing and talking. Their smiling faces makes your mouth lift up to a gentle one of your own. Your laughter mixing with theirs in an uneven sound. Belonging with theirs, but still it's own individual.

You are still aware though, of the knife in your hand. It's still clean and shining, new and still untouched by the stains of blood.

Come morning, that will not be so. Come morning, all innocent traces you had left, will be lost.

_Wake up darling._

_--_

_Can you see now, the land of which we walked? Can you hear now, the song of the forest, the very same that we heard? Can you feel now, the same feelings that we had, when we were faced with the things we had to do?_

_No? Well, that is understandable. I would elaborate, but this old person's bones are starting to rattle. And I can't stay awake as long as I used to. If you will so, you may come back._

_And I will continue with my tale._

_Of mercenaries that were only human. And of humans who were at mercy to a cruel fate._

oOo

A/N Hmm... No matter what I do to this, I don't think what I tried to type gave my original idea justice. Oh well, I think this is as close to what I wanted as I can get. Anyway, yes. There will be romance in it. But you will just have to guess who the couples are. 'Cuz I'm not gunna give away the names, lol. I think it'll be fun just to see what you people think the pairings are. But if it's any indication, it's a Sakura pairing. Because, of the people that know me, and my writing style- that I hope has matured over the space of time- I can only focus on one girl. And that is Sakura. As you can see. Anyway.

If you have any comments or questions, just send me a PM or in the form of a review! But I want reviews!

But, let me just get this out of the way.

Read and Review! Please, and I mean pretty please. Very proud of work I have done, and I want to improve my work. I want to be a writer in the future! So, yeah. No flames in the case that does not help me in any way. At all.

Sincerely,

_Midnight-chan_


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